Happy (Single) Mother's Day

Breakfast in Bed?

Daydreaming is a wonderful yet risky thing. I recall how challenging Mother's Day felt when my ex and I were trying to have a child. On one hand, I was glad to honor my own mother and the women around me raising their children, but on the other, I was heartbroken not to be celebrating myself. That's when the daydreams started. Maybe next year. I could already envision it—a cozy baby, with my husband bringing me a hot mug of coffee in bed. It felt peaceful and joyful. I imagined my child growing up, climbing into bed with me on Mother's Day to give me flowers and say he made me breakfast. It might have been a peculiar mix of yogurt and goldfish, but it was mine. My husband would surprise me with gift cards or jewelry, maybe helping my child create a card or draw a stick figure picture of me. As silly as these daydreams might have been, they sustained me through my infertility journey.

Dreams Come True

I was right. My first Mother's Day was magical. My husband went way over the top and completely spoiled me. I got to sleep in, I got breakfast in bed, and I was showered with gifts. Everything from rings with my son's birthstone to coffee mugs that said "MAMA." The only phrase to describe that first Mother's Day is "Dreams come true."

Where are my presents?

I know, I know. I sound like a spoiled brat right now, but my first Mother's Day as a single mom hit me like a ton of bricks. I knew it would be different, but I guess I didn't realize how different. My son, PJ, was only 4 at the time. He didn't know it was Mother's Day. He didn't know that other kids were waking up early with their dads to sneak out of the house and grab Starbucks and roses for their mommies. He didn't know that other kids were tracing handprints on construction paper to make a special picture for mom. I'm not sure why I still expected a gift from my ex-husband. I guess I thought I'm not his wife anymore, but I'm still Parker's mom, right? That part didn't change. I made the best of the day. I filled it with extra cuddles with my son and time spent with family. Still, I couldn't help but feel a little sad. All the daydreams of Cheerios in bed and homemade trinkets...gone. Being a single mom on Mother's Day is hard. You don't want to feel childish or silly, but you want to be celebrated too. You are tired too. You deserve an extra hour of sleep too. You deserve a meal cooked for you too. You deserve clean dishes and extra cuddles too. So...what can you do to feel a little extra love that day?

Single Mother's Day Ideas

As Hannah Montana said, "Life's what you make it, so let's make it rock." There are a lot of things mothers have to adapt to when they become single moms, and Mother's Day is one of those things. Don't make a day where you should be feeling extra loved and celebrated a sad one. Here are some of my favorite ideas for a happy (single) Mother's Day.

1. "Mommy & Me" Scrapbook.

   Print out some photos of you and your child(ren), grab some stickers, markers, scrapbook paper, and get to work. Let your little one help you cut, color, stick, and pick out the photos. Bonus fun if you grab your favorite snacks and play some fun music in the background. (Check out the "Mom Life-Must Haves" tab for materials. Coming soon!)

   
   

2. Picnic

   Set up a blanket at the park or on the floor of the living room! Order pizza and make it fun. Bring along your child(ren)'s favorite stuffed animals too.

   
   

3. Movie Night

   Stop at the store for all the best movie snacks and candies. Order matching Pjs for you and your kid(s).

   
   

4. Bake together

   Get some matching aprons, sprinkle some flour on each other's noses, and enjoy your sweet treats for dessert.

   
   

5. Design T-shirts for each other

   Buy plain white T-shirts and fabric markers. Have your child decorate yours and you decorate theirs. Then surprise each other with the results and wear them all day.

   
   

6. Shopping Spree

   Take your child(ren) to a store that sells cheaper items (think Dollar Tree or Five Below). Give him/her/them $10 and let them pick out some Mother's Day gifts for you.

   
   

7. Spa day

   Buy face masks, lotions, and bubbles. Have an at-home "spa day" with your little one. Pamper yourself and them! Make it extra fun by lighting candles (real or fake) and playing relaxing music. You can even make homemade face masks and "spa snacks" like trail mix or cucumber water.

   
   

8. TREAT YOURSELF!

   It's also totally okay to splurge on yourself a bit more on Mother's Day. Move some of those items you saved months ago on Amazon into your cart. Order yourself the fancier takeout. Buy a bottle of wine and enjoy a glass after bedtime or even make a fun mocktail. You deserve to be celebrated and should be practicing self-care every day, but make it a priority on Mother's Day.