It is casual now? (Book Boyfriend: Chapter 3)

A series of unfortunate events

After two unsuccessful dates and a failed attempt at "Playing the Field," I've decided it's definitely time to meet Book Boyfriend again. We've been chatting daily, and he's even teased me about my dating mishaps. We've agreed that our third date will be at my place... oh no.

A boy... oops, "Man" is coming over.

Code red. Okay, my son is with his grandparents tonight, so I have the whole house to myself. Should I leave his toys out or hide them? Hide them? Girl, what are you thinking? He knows you have a son, so just leave the toys out. Okay, fire trucks and crayons stay out.

What's next? Light a candle, definitely. All my candles are girly and smell like vanilla. Dang it, I should have bought a more masculine scent! It's fine, it's fine.

What do I wear? When I went to his house, he wore sweatpants... so I'll just wear sweatpants too. My only clean ones are bright red and have Minnie Mouse at the bottom... I guess they'll have to do.

I make a big deal of arranging the snacks just right. He really likes those healthy whole food curls and anything high protein (gym bro energy). I set out two wine glasses and open a bottle of red wine. Now I wait.

2 hours later…

Perhaps Book Boyfriend isn't as flawless as I imagined. He chose to meet a friend for a drink before coming to see me and is now 2 hours late. I pour myself a glass of red wine and start demolishing my meticulously arranged snack plate as I dig into the crunchy food. I blow out the candle and am about to tell him not to come anymore when my phone pings, “I’m here.”

Well, there goes all my self-respect. I quickly relight the candle, run a comb through my hair, and hurry out the door to greet him.

He hugs me and apologizes for being so late. He said he would have understood if I canceled, but he's glad I didn't. He looks different—slightly worn out and tired. We sit on the couch, and I offer him a glass of water instead of the wine that's been sitting out for too long. I remember that on our last date, his grandmother was ill. I ask him how she’s doing. He tells me she passed away. The fatigue in his eyes now makes sense. I tell

him we don’t have to talk about it. He reflects on the day a bit. You can tell sharing something this personal with someone is difficult for him. I allow him to share as much as he would like. When he seems a bit tired from the emotional conversation, I suggest giving him the "grand tour" of the house. I cover everything, even the playroom filled with stuffed animals and coloring books.

We end up having a relaxed evening. We watch a silly movie and cuddle. I recall thinking I might not see him again after this. I'm unsure how he feels after opening up to me like that.

The next day he texts me to see how I’m doing, and we plan our next date.

Time Flies when you’re in a situationship?

There's another date, then another, and another, and so on. Before I know it, we go from meeting once a week to twice, then three times a week. We're now talking every day for most of the day.

We're not officially in a relationship, but we're not exactly not in one either.

He goes on a work trip to Portugal, and I tell him, “I won’t text much so he can enjoy his trip, but I’m looking forward to seeing him when he returns.” (Isn’t this what people do when they’re casually dating?)

He says that's unnecessary and he still wants to hear from me. He returns the night before Christmas Eve. I got him a small gift, and he brings me chocolates from Portugal.

One night, I arrive at his apartment with a trash bag and a bottle of bleach. We thoroughly clean his bathroom and kitchen. Afterwards, he treats me to tacos and margaritas.

He gets in a car accident. (He's okay!) I Venmo him $15 for a coffee or drink to cheer him up. A few weeks later, I tell him I'm bringing my son to Chuck E. Cheese. He Venmos me $25 for pizza and arcade games.

He introduces me to the Netflix show, “Black Mirror.” We watch every episode together and aren't allowed to watch them apart. We have a show now. Super casual relationship.

No reality allowed! Keep out!

One night, we really want to hang out, but his apartment has been taken over by family, and my son is home. We aren’t really hungry, and there are no good movies out. I suppose we could just drive around? I pick him up. He jokes about needing two houses so we don't have to sit in my car, and I agree. He suggests we could hang out in his storage unit instead. I enter the address into my GPS and start driving. We find ourselves sitting on the floor of Book Boyfriend's storage unit, where he switches on his book light. We spend hours talking and laughing at how weird we are, enjoying our own little escape from reality in this small storage unit. After feeling like total dorks for a while, we decide to leave our makeshift clubhouse and go out for sushi before saying goodnight. During dinner, I mention that I skipped a date with another guy at a 5-star restaurant to hang out with him in a storage unit. (True story, by the way.) We both laugh, and I head back home.

Oh no.

I park my car and remove the keys from the ignition. Leaning my head against the headrest, I take a deep breath. Wait a minute... Did I really skip a date with a guy at a 5-star restaurant to spend time with Book Boyfriend in a storage unit? Oh no. I think I have feelings for him. I think I really have feelings for him. I "like-like" him. I might need to arrange a date with someone new soon because this can't be happening! I can't be caught in a situationship... right? My phone pings, "Goodnight 🌙"

We set up another date 3 days later. Casual dating 101.